Lose The Lingo

Dear friends, we’re gathered here to bury corporate buzzwords. Those annoying, pretentious catch-phrases that seep into every meeting. The cute lines that confuse, more than clarify.

It’s time we push back on idea showers and babble-speak.

Stop the madness and just say what you mean!

Here’s My Take. Let’s wipe out corporate lingo in our lifetime. Starting with:

Multi-tasking: We’re dumping this project on you    

Sweet spot: A mythical goal, a unicorn

Leverage our position: Put their balls in a vise

Customer-centric: We focus on the wrong things, but used alliteration

Low-hanging fruit: You’re missing obvious opportunities

Give 110%: Be best

Build consensus: Ask around, are you good with this?

Let’s have a tag-up: You’re blowing it. Call me

Decided to pivot: Competitors are giving us a wedgie

Working in silos: Teamwork, people. Don’t be assholes

Take that off-line: Make your point, or shut up

Revisit later: Put this on the back burner. Forever.

Mission critical: Here’s your top priority. Forget what I said last week

Thought leader: What to call your boss if you’re up for a raise

Rightsizing: We’re firing people, but gave it a clever spin

Leverage synergies: Start looking for a new job

Risk averse: You’re too chicken, grow a pair

Strategic thinking: We’re totally lost, got any ideas?

Negative growth: We’re losing money. But used the word ‘growth’

Stick to core competency: We’ll be closing a division

Paradigm shift: We’ll be closing several divisions

Get lean and mean: No raises. Forget about vacations

Attack the straw man: Nobody’s sure what this means

At the end of the day: All that matters is the next sentence

Beau Phillips is President of Rainmaker Media. 
He’s a creative marketing consultant, strategist and speaker.
Reach him at 203-256-9347   
Beau.phillips@gmail.com 
@RainmakerBeau

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